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You make me miserable

Took Karen's advice and started browsing some sites for a net-date. I feel kinda pathetic really, cause net-dating seems over rated. It feels like I'm cheating, going behind Amy's back to find another woman, but how can I be cheating if she wasn't even sure our relationship existed or not? I'm just getting sick of being introduced as "friend."

My mom was talking to my Uncle on the phone once, he knows that I'm gay apparently now and asked if we were "lovers." I only wish that were the case. Anything but what we are now.

I'm clueless how to break this to her. I can't fathom how she'll react. Either "I don't care, whatever" or "no, don't leave" and start up all that crap again. How do you tell someone "You make me miserable" in a subtle way? Is there any way to put that subtly? I keep hearing that sentence over and over in my head. Whenever I'm around her, or talking to her on the phone, the only thing I think is you make me miserable.

1:02 am - July 10th, 2007

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