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X-mas after and a rant

Today isn't my day. Everything seems to be falling apart at my feet. Mice chewed my old scanner's cord all to hell so it doesn't connect, my PS2 controller is fucked because someone must've been in my room again while I was away and broke a prong out. I got a nice new scanner for x-mas and can't use it (go figure) because apparently I don't have enough RAM on this cinder block I own. Lost the USB connector and now I'm totally screwed there. To top it all off, I have to see the dermatologist sometime to check out this weird dark spot on my arm. It seems to be spreading.

So...what I got for x-mas:

CD player (got one last year, but it was a piece o' crap. Damn you Aiwa!)

Mortal Kombat Armageddon (Got it for the custom characters)

Resident Evil DS (Chris' game is really hard! D: )

Mortal Kombat DVD (Even if it sucks, it was only five bucks, so who cares)

The Child Manuela (Maedchen in Uniform) (Lesbian book first published in 1934. I've only just started reading. This was hard to find.)

Teddy Scares: Granger Evermore (Another teddy scares bear from Amy. That makes three now.)

Gift from Aniki (Haven't received this in the mail yet)

Spent X-mas break over at Amy's. I'm glad to be home, really. I like my alone time and having someone hang around you for twenty-four hours a day is quite tiring. Especially when they're someone like Amy who needs constant attention. There are times I like to just lay around and do nothing, but that doesn't seem like an option to her. It's always roleplay, roleplay, roleplay every day for hours on end. My hand hurts from writing. I think my cat would die without me here. She's so...pathetic. She'll barely even eat without me around. Clingy fuzzball.

I can't believe...actually yes I can believe that I'm the only female member of my family who isn't a slut. I hate the fact that my mom can just stand there and chat away about all these guys she slept with when she was younger as if it were nothing special. Makes me sick. Then she has the balls to go and say to me "when you turn eighteen, you might be 'wilder' too." In other words, I'm gonna run around and fuck a bunch of guys too. I refuse to become my mom. She's a good example of what NOT to be. Plus, I might as well face it, cause it's true...who the hell is gonna be attracted to a dark-haired, pale-faced, fuzzy-eyebrowed, small-boobed, big-nosed, dander-ridden girl like me? I already know I'm not that pleasing to the eye. Everyone wants the skinny ninety-pound sluts now. Oh yeah. They'll just be flocking around my ass...yeah right.

That's probably why I don't feel my age. All the eighteen year olds you see are pretty, dolled up with makeup with long shiny legs and a small frame. I'm just...blah. Plain clothes and plain looking. Average everyday person. At least I have more self-respect than anyone else in my family. I don't spread my legs for everyone.

6:30 pm - December 30th, 2006

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